Podcast Snippets: Moving Towards Student-Led Solutions

By Monica McGuire, Director of Communications, Russell Coaching

As parents, we often have set ideas of the best way for our child to do things or to relate to the world. If we are extroverted, we may expect our child to be extroverted too. We may place a high value on how many friends they have and how many activities they are involved in. We may think they aren’t living to their full potential if they aren’t doing things the way we expect. 

Recently, on the Hacking Your ADHD podcast, Dr. Russell made a plea to parents to be open to what works for their students. She admits to losing a year of her life trying to figure out the best way to store her son’s legos. She said, “I had all these fancy ideas about Legos. Oh. They were going to be sorted by color, by shape, by size.” When she finally asked her son what he thought about these ideas, he told her he just wanted them all in big bins. “Like huge, enormous, tubs that you store holiday decor in.” And that just blew her mind. All of the Legos together.

But that was what worked for her son and she could have saved herself a lot of mental energy just by asking his opinion in the first place. 

Dr. Russell encourages parents to give their children, and themselves,  permission to play around and figure out what works for them. Not only that, but she encourages families to try new ideas without shaming or blaming if an idea doesn't work. She recommends saying, “Let's figure out what's going to help.” For example, if your student forgets to bring their folder home or turn in some homework, start by accepting that reality. Let them know that it is okay, that this is going to happen sometimes. Then ask your student what their ideas are for how they can remember next time. Like Dr. Russell, you may be surprised by the solution your student comes up with. 

Want to hear the whole Hacking Your ADHD podcast? Click HERE.

About the Author
Monica McGuire is a writer and parent who believes all relationships, including parent-child relationships, flourish under mutual respect, curiosity, kindness, and compassion. She lives in Michigan with her family where she is constantly being challenged to listen to, understand, and appreciate her teenagers’ points of view. You can reach her at monicamcguire100@gmail.com.